I’m not sorry?

Posted May 7, 2014 by Octavia in Random Ramblings / 0 Comments

So I’ve been feeling really bad lately and I think the best way to get it out is to write a post about why I’m feeling bad and what I plan to do about that. You see this time last year I was the one watching everyone get ready for BEA. I was the one envious of all the “I get to meet this blogger!!” and “oh my gosh they’re going to have that highly coveted ARC no one else can get!” tweets and post. And to be perfectly honest I was annoyed as hell by all of it! I feel no shame in admitting I unfollowed, muted and all around just sat to the side, green with envy. But this year is different! This year I’m the one tweeting, counting down and doing post about BEA and while I am unbelieveablly excited I haven’t forgotten about how I felt last year.

(Sort of like this)

Kat Sad Face

And this is why I feel somewhat bad. Yes I understand that I can’t personally ensure that everyone gets to go to BEA but I can do my best of trying not to constantly remind people that they’re not going. Maybe I could limit the tweets? Promise not to post ALL the pics while I’m there? Stop with the down to the second countdowns I do at least 3 times a day? But should I really have to? I love this community so much and I love the people I’m lucky enough to interact with on a daily basis. But why do I feel this need to put a lid on my excitement? Since when is it ok to feel bad about being able to do something you’ve worked really hard for and have wanted to do for so long?

I’ve had a few people tweet that they want ALL the juicy details (Pili & Julie!) but I’ve also seen twice as many tweets that go more along the lines of “can you all stop with the BEA post/tweets?! I can’t go and it’s annoying”. And while I know it’s a personal problem that some people can’t go, for reasons I can’t explain I feel like I have this duty to my followers to at least be courteous. But that’s the problem! I feel this duty but on the other hand I just want to record a video of me counting down to BEA and put it on replay because I’m just that excited!! I keep trying to tell myself that I’ll do a huge giveaway to make up for my gushing but that would be like bribing someone for forgiveness, and we all know I’m not that kind of person.

Which brings me to a stand still. Do you guys like/appreciate all the BEA excitement even though you can’t go? Or do you sort of just want to mute all the BEA going folks? Are you going to BEA/Bookcon and have had the same guilty thoughts? Leave your comments below and be honest! This will always be a judge free zone and I really just want to know. 🙂

Tags:

Divider